Episode Description:
In this episode, Aimee gets real about what it feels like to let her 10-year-old son roam the streets of Girona, Spain, a departure from the overprotective parenting norms of the US. Drawing from her own upbringing in the 80s, Aimee explores the cultural shift in parenting styles, influenced by societal fears and the insights of psychologist Jonathan Haidt's recent interview with Bari Weiss.
The conversation delves into the challenges of finding social connections for her son in a new country, navigating school choices, and relearning how to live differently. Despite cultural differences, Aimee finds solace in the school's proactive stance against screen time, providing a glimpse into a more traditional childhood experience.
Even as Expats we have to live our real lives - if you're a parent navigating the unique challenges of raising a kid in a new country, or anyone curious about the cultural differences about parenting in Spain versus parenting in the United States, this episode is for you!
Resources:
Smartphones Rewired Childhood. Here's How to Fix It.
Where to find Aimee:
Where to find Rebecca:
Episode Description:
In this episode, Aimee gets real about what it feels like to let her 10-year-old son roam the streets of Girona, Spain, a departure from the overprotective parenting norms of the US. Drawing from her own upbringing in the 80s, Aimee explores the cultural shift in parenting styles, influenced by societal fears and the insights of psychologist Jonathan Haidt's recent interview with Bari Weiss.
The conversation delves into the challenges of finding social connections for her son in a new country, navigating school choices, and relearning how to live differently. Despite cultural differences, Aimee finds solace in the school's proactive stance against screen time, providing a glimpse into a more traditional childhood experience.
Even as Expats we have to live our real lives - if you're a parent navigating the unique challenges of raising a kid in a new country, or anyone curious about the cultural differences about parenting in Spain versus parenting in the United States, this episode is for you!
Resources:
Smartphones Rewired Childhood. Here's How to Fix It.
Where to find Aimee:
Where to find Rebecca:
Welcome to Bonjola, a podcast about two women, Amy and Rebecca, who each moved from the United States to Europe to become expats, Amy to Spain and Rebecca to France. We're here to share the highs, the lows, and the logistics of this adventure, encourage you to follow your own move abroad dreams, and remind you that you're not alone when the going gets tough. Enjoy.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Bonjola, Rebecca.
Track 1:I hear that you have sent your child into the wild to play by himself on the streets of Girona, Spain. How's that feeling?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:I have, my heart feels fluttery. I've never, you know, I've never subscribed to helicopter parenting. I'm, you know, by classic definitions, I'm not a helicopter parent. And one of the reasons why we were excited to move to a culture like this was so that my son could have more freedom. So that we could let him walk to the corner store and get us groceries when I'm in the middle of making dinner and I need something without worries of someone calling CPS because they're deeply concerned that a child is by themselves in this horrifically dangerous world, which isn't actually horrifically dangerous with cameras everywhere now and cell phones and everybody's spying on everybody. But at the same time. It's, It's, super scary. I'm not used to that. He's, he's okay. Like he's okay with it. He's totally fine with it and that's good and that's appropriate at his age and it's healthy and I'm happy that he's not nervous about it. but you know, I, I grew up in the eighties and You know, part of actually part of my suggestion and willingness and excitement for him to do this was, was due to a podcast episode of honestly that I listened to in the middle of the night when I woke up and then it was so compelling. I didn't fall asleep for like the whole hour and a half that the episode was going, but it was an interview with Jonathan Haidt, who has been writing about the immense fragility of America's children. And, one of his books was the coddling of the American mind. And he's released another one about the kids. And so Barry Weiss was interviewing him about this and he was, he was talking about how we ended up in this place and you and I are both of the generation of how we ended up in this place. Because it really started with, you know, the seventies and the eighties, there were kidnappings and plane hijacks and things going on. And he said, statistically at that point in time in American history, it was actually more dangerous. That wasn't like we were not being paranoid. It was statistically speaking, a more dangerous time. although it became hyperinflated because there were three news channels and everybody was watching the news and anything that was that novel because it was not common was played over and over again. Right. And so parents became afraid parents.,deterred their children from free roaming and just running out in the street and playing. you know, I, I did some of that as a young girl, but it was always with a caveat. Like my parents were very explicit and letting me know there are people who hide in the woods to kidnap little girls, so be careful. Um, so it was always an element of danger, but I was allowed to do it, you know, stay close and, and so on. And our kids aren't, our kids are not even allowed to go to the park really by themselves much anymore. And as a parent, as a working parent, as a parent who doesn't have the personality to devote a hundred percent of my time and attention to entertaining my child. I found parenting in the United States to be, there are several words competing to get out of my mouth. Horrific is the loudest one. And I think that's hyperbolic. Um, it's my inner drama queen coming out, but it was the, the expectation was that my child either be sequestered in the home or I devote my life to. Personally chauffeuring them everywhere that they want to go, that they need to go for curated events. And that wasn't, that didn't work for my lifestyle. It didn't work for my personality. And I'm not even sure that would have worked for my son. Had we
Track 1:yeah, and that's the thing, if we're trying to build resilient, capable adults, we cannot shelter them from the world their entire childhood. That's the, that's counter to the end goal. If that is the end goal, let's give our listeners a little bit of context. How old is your son right now?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:He's he's 10, 10 and a half.
Track 1:Cause obviously these questions change throughout the chapters of a child's life too.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:absolutely. And I was, you know, I was outside playing in the yard by myself, in front of my parents business by myself when I was, Six, seven years old, I think, you know, much younger than he is. And, and I did also have some of that childhood that, that Gen Z is experiencing now that my son as an only child is experiencing now with two working parents where I did spend a great deal of time alone in the home. And I didn't have as much free roaming and as much social interaction as I needed as a child. And it has been particularly heartbreaking for me to watch that pattern be repeated in my own son, who is. Very extroverted. His nature is extremely extroverted and as he has gotten older and particularly with the pandemic, that innate curiosity and exploration has really shut down. And I am, I am, I am terrified of him entering adolescence with this pattern that's well established of him at home with a book, a tablet, a pen. Or a screen his interactions being with social interactions, being largely limited to weekends when he can play Minecraft with his friends back in the States. Thank goodness he has made a friend from school here then, and they actually had a hangout. He's too old for a play date. A hangout yesterday, but, um, he is not interested in joining any of the football teams here, meaning. European soccer, not American football. Right. And, I've made some suggestions for some other activities and he isn't very interested. And I think it's, you know, I kind of missed the window there of his curiosity and trying those things. And I'm still, I want to be the parent that says, well, this is for your own good. And if you don't like it, you have to keep doing it, but we are going to take. You know, karate lessons for a month to try it out because it's good for you. And. And I, I find myself hesitating to do it because of the story I have in my head about the gotta make sure he gets home from school and take him to the lesson and put, you know, that whole thing and delaying of dinner. And, and, and for me too, because I'm still working predominantly in West coast, American hours, that's a day of work. I can't do if my son gets to have an extracurricular activity, it is a lost day of work for me.
Track 1:So here we are, he is not in the house. He's gone out into the wild.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:He's gone!. I set him free.
Track 1:How did that, how did this come to be and where did he go off to do what? How did we get it started? Because this is a first step in the direction you're saying you want to go.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Yeah. It's something that, so, so this week is, is Semana Santa. It's the week before Easter. The kids are out of school. Um, I think we've talked about before, Spain is not a Catholic country really. It's, it is the most dominant religion, but like less than 15 percent of the nation considers themselves Catholic. So this is a time when people take a vacation, they go and visit family and spend time with family. And, You know, we don't have that community established yet. We don't have an adopted Catalan grandmother to go and visit or anything like that. So it's essentially like spring break in the States where his dad and I are working and he's at home. And it's been, you know, it's been frustrating for me to see him in this place again when it's like, we moved here so we could break free of this, but here we are. Right. Because we don't know any other way. And as a child, I didn't, I didn't No, any other way either. My parents had started their own business during the recession of the eighties. They were working so hard and I was, I spent a lot of my childhood in an office with a television set in their business. So I don't, I don't know how to model it for him. I don't know how to like, what do people do to make that happen? It was never, it wasn't a thing for me either. So I feel like we're coming into this with a real deficit,
Track 1:and you're also dealing with something we've talked about before, which is bringing our American habits with us to
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:yes.
Track 1:You know, we don't, they don't just. You know, fall away on their own, you know, we are creatures of habit. I know I've brought my. Special work habits with me, which is not what we're going to talk about right now. But yeah, you're talking about your own childhood baggage or history or knowledge, your own experience with your parents and your feelings about that. Your hopes for what you'll be as a parent, your hopes for what Spain will be. And you're still having to live your regular life. So I'm curious when you think about, because my understanding is that this move was very much for your parenting, for your son, and I know you have certain hopes about how it's going to play out, so. So given where you are right now, we're about nine, 10 months, I think, into your adventure. How is it so far aligning with what you hope to create and where do you really still need to figure out some of these answers?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:I had really hoped that it was going to be easier for him to have more social opportunities here. And by and large, it is. There's more, we certainly have had more social activities than we had in the states, the past four years. However, a lot of the kids here are doing soccer practice. They are involved in extracurricular activities. And so they're not always available. He does still have more screen time than I want him to have. And I don't know how it works. You know, I think actually, I think how it works is that his, is that here after school, the kids go outside, they, everybody's playing football. Everybody's, you know, they go outside, they go into a plaza, they kick, kick a football around. And that's how they make friends. That's how they meet people. That's how they do things. And, and so we're coming into that culture late because all of those kids. They've been playing football since they were like, four, five, six years old. They're good. They're quick. They all know each
Track 1:Right. So they were all born and raised together as well. So he's also dealing with that outsider perspective. Like a lot of military kids, like myself deal with and stuff. Like, how do you find your place when everybody's so established?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Exactly. And he goes to a private school that is not in our
Track 1:Ah, more
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:the neighborhood kids. Yeah, exactly. And the school that he goes to busses children in from everywhere. Like from the Mediterranean coast, which is like 30 minutes, 45 minutes away. All the, you know, they are, they bring in children from everywhere. And so he isn't going to have a friend group that is, you know, a neighborhood friend group. And so one of the other parents said that it was one of the things that really helped their daughters was to join an afterschool neighborhood activity, um, so that they could meet other children in the neighborhood. And that's one area where I'm, you know, I'm feeling that that's where I need to stretch myself and look for opportunities. And then, you know, be, be the authority here and be like, I know you don't want to do this right now, but we need to try new things. This is important. This is good for you. If you don't like it, you won't don't have to do it forever, but we need to try. Cause we don't know until we try and that, you know, that, that will likely happen maybe this summer when we get back from the States. Um, For sure. I want to, now that I'm saying this out loud, I want to do this by fall because he is, he is rapidly entering adolescence. And that's a time where I really want him to have a good quality support system to lean on, you know, as he enters that stage of development and a community that he feels he's a part of. And the, the episode of honestly, and for our listeners, if you have children and you haven't checked it out, I highly recommend it. It's an interview with Jonathan Haidt on Honestly with Barry Weiss. He was saying how, you know, essentially what we need to do to give our children the resiliency that they need to live lives and take risks is to send them out, send them outside. And, and to collectively like parents don't do it because they don't want to be the only one doing it. Kids want a phone because everybody else has a phone. nobody likes the situation we're in. Nobody likes the situation. The kids don't like the social media, but everybody is on it. Parents don't like it. Schools hate it, but everybody is doing it because everybody is
Track 1:including the schools, the schools use it heavily for communication. Actually, I'd like to talk about the schools for a second. I remember when I. When I was really young, when I was two, my parents moved to Germany with the military. And one of the big things they had to decide was where they were going to send me to school. You know, this five year old American girl with, yeah, the numbers don't add up there, but I was young. So I don't remember the math, but in any case, I know this part's true. You know, they had the choice between busing me an hour to the American school, or I could literally walk across the street, but I'd be going to a German school, like the local school. tiny German school. And they chose because I was so young, they chose to just send me across the street to the German school. And I was a sponge and I picked up the language, no problem. And I know that choosing the school was a big part of how you chose Girona. And now that you are, you know, looking at the reality and the challenges, how do you feel about The choices around school and what advice would you give to people who are trying to explore the school question when it comes to becoming an expat?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:that's a great question. I still feel the school was the right choice with the immensity of how much of a change this was with the fact that we've chosen a place in Spain where there's two new languages to learn, not just one. feel that throwing him into a public school, which would have been predominantly Catalan, with some Spanish and not a strong emphasis on English, plus having to learn a new school methodology would have been incredibly challenging for him. The Montessori school, the private school is a Montessori school, and he's been in Montessori since he was two and a half. And so having that as an anchor for him, not having to learn how to learn a new way and, in two different languages that he doesn't know well, you know, I feel that that first half a year that was already a challenge for him simply because of the culture changes and the language would have been that much worse had the The, the ideology, the school ideology methodology been different. So I do feel like it's still the right choice. You know, and it's such a, it's such an individual thing. For each child, and there are expats here whose different children go to different schools because they're not being met at one school or another. And, you know, you definitely want to look at the options, get connected with other parents in the area. who are in public school who are in private school, if that's a choice you're considering talk to them about how integration was for their children, the pros and the cons, you can get a lot of information from the community if you connect with the community first and and that's that's the key. I think is, hopefully, you know, for people who are considering that move, they're moving to a place where there is some type of community that they can tap into. Right. Before,
Track 1:And have you found that the Montessori experience has been very equivalent to the Montessori experience back in the States?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:by and large. Yes. Yeah, absolutely. My son started doing what the children are calling tests this year, which was something that he had never done in his previous Montessori school. And they're essentially, the teacher's way of basically, you know, here's a timed math. Here's a little quizzes to see if her lessons are landing and if the children are learning. But because my son hadn't been exposed to any kind of test, I'm air quoting there. He was fraught with anxiety about each one and, you know, these exams and, oh my gosh, he's, and I'm like, exams, why are you doing exams? You shouldn't be doing exams in Montessori. This isn't like. It's not a thing. I actually talked with another parent because my son was having such a hard time and she's like, they're not doing exams. My son is like, I don't know what's going on, but they're not doing exams. So then I knew, okay, there's a mismatch of what's happening and what he is perceiving. And maybe there's also a language translation issue, right? And the kids call it a test or an exam and in his mind that means one thing, but for them it means something else. And so when I met with the teacher, she was like, no, no, we're not doing that. I do assessments to make sure that everybody is. You know, picking up the, the lessons and, and so, you know, we, we had some conversations about that. And after we met with the teacher, his, his attitude and his fear around that shifted significantly. And so now it's not a big deal. And he also knows, well, these are also in part practice to prepare for upper elementary for middle, you know, for high school where there will be
Track 1:I was wondering, because obviously tests and timed things and deadlines are a part of real life adulting. So that does, that is integrated into Montessori, just not at the younger ages. There
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:it's integrated into the Montessori here. I don't know, you know, he's in, he's in a different level of Montessori than he was when we left. He's now in, um, wait, is that accurate? No, that might, no, that's not, I don't want to do the math right now.
Track 1:will be no math on this podcast.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:yeah, no math. No, no math. I do not know if his peers in the States are also being introduced to this. Or if it's something that is delayed until later.
Track 1:So you're feeling good about the choice of school and it's brought up some challenges that you didn't anticipate in terms of creating those social groups combined with something that did surprise me because you, you know, you said, and I know he's very, gregarious and extroverted. So do you feel that he just doesn't like soccer or is he showing his nerves?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:I think it's a little bit of both. He's not, he's not a competitive person and. The boy culture here is reminiscent of, you know, boy culture that we grew up with a little more. So a little, you know, rough and tumble competitive outdo each other kind of boy culture, um, which we did not have exposure to in our ultra progressive liberal Pacific Northwest town.
Track 1:Little marshmallow men.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Yes. Yes, precisely. And, uh, and so that was a big shock for him, something he was not used to, something that was very difficult for him at first. And we would have these conversations where he was like, I feel like I'm being, becoming more mean. I feel like I'm becoming more angry. Sometimes I. I do things that, you know, like I behave that way too now. And I'm like, you know, that's, it's, that's normal. That's part of what's going to happen. It's okay. And it's okay to have it.
Track 1:and pluses testosterone is going to start flaring up. So he's going to be having feelings that are unrelated to any of this stuff and just literal puberty too, to
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Yeah. Yeah. And we've seen little flashes of that too, where he's like, I'm really angry and I don't know why it's like, it's, it's, it's, It happens. It's okay. It's okay to be angry. I know it happens to all of us. Exactly. And, so that that's part of it is he's, he's not competitive. He's not innately aggressive. That's not, you know, his father doesn't have that attribute either. And so it, it comes strongly through his genetic line that he's not going to be one of those. I'm the winner. I'm going to be the winner. It's not where his ego gets validated. So he's not drawn to soccer for that reason. he has enjoyed with his friend group at school, he has enjoyed playing soccer or playing football on the playground during recess. And so he has had exposure to the game. He plays the game. He now likes watching it, watching games. And I'm like, okay, let's lean into that a little bit because I think that's, that's a way to connect with the culture here. That's a way to connect with people here. And. And the games are fun to watch and they are fun to, when you go to a game in Spain, every team has their theme song, everyone knows it, and they're all singing with just so much heart and it's such a fantastic, we have to have you guys come to a Girona football game.
Track 1:we would love it.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Like that has to happen. That would be
Track 1:We have to admit though, that, Damien and I have talked about it quite often. We were here for when France was in the world cup, actually, we were right over a massive bar. And then they, and it was a heck of a game and it went into overtime. And it was finally one with a. Whatever they, you call that kick thing. And then everyone, I'm very sad. You know, it was almost a win, but the energy's amazing, but they can take it a little far. I mean, they, the rivalries are real and they will beat each other up and like destroy property. And I'm not saying it happens every time, but I'm not the kind of person who's inclined to put myself in situations where that's in the air. How, how have you. What have you felt in Girona? Is it like a friendly fire or is it aggressive?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Well, the one game I went to, we won. So, it helped. And I have not, in my neighborhood, I have not noticed any, any, you know, we, we lost one of the last games of the season to Madrid, and, I didn't notice. In fact, I had to go and look up the score because there wasn't, there was no rioting. Vehicles were not burning. It was okay. But you know, maybe, maybe this is where, this is where Europe puts its energy now since they've agreed to stop warring with each other by and large. It all goes down to football.
Track 1:yeah, like the old gladiators and all that stuff. Right. Cause we have to have outlets for competition and for positioning ourselves as humans. It's biological. Um, I don't know. Have you watched, um, Welcome to Wrexham?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:No, I haven't.
Track 1:and for our listeners too, it is Delightful. It is funny. It is poignant. It is practically made for TV because of how the out, of how it's going and it is the best way I have ever learned to learn about it. Football, European soccer, because Ryan Reynolds and the other guy, and literally I'm not the only person who does that, um, McElhaney, I can't remember, but anyway, they basically bought this Soccer league, football league, without knowing anything about it. I mean, it's just a banana's purchase and a banana's story. So you're kind of learning how it all works alongside of them from a very American perspective. It's fantastic. I highly recommend it.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Oh, have you?
Track 1:So let's circle back to the beginning. How's your little mama's heart feeling? Your son has been out of the house for 26 minutes and 51 seconds. Transcribed
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:No, God. I jest, I'm okay. I mean, it's, you know, as he was getting ready in my mind, it was like, what if he loses my keys? What if someone steals his wallet? What if he gets beaten up? Right. I'm like, It'll be okay. It'll, it'll
Track 1:around outside of you when you're a mom.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Head is, yeah. And they tell you what happens and you know what's gonna happen and it happens and you're like scared.
Track 1:And so what were his plans? Was he like, yeah, I'm going to go see a friend or I'm just going to wander, or I'm going to go to this arcade. Like what did he have an address?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:He's just gonna wander. He's gonna wander. We gave him parameters. you know, don't go beyond the cobblestones. Stay in old town where there's cobblestones. And, you know, there's a couple of stores that he wants to check out. And I encouraged him to go to the plaza where the kids kick a ball around after school like to see, you know, you can go that far. You can check
Track 1:Does he and do the kids carry cell phones around there?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:No. no, at least, I mean, in the school, the school that we go to is very anti cell phone, anti internet for the children. and they're like, they're aggressively so, which I appreciate because a Montessori school in a. Tech industry driven city drops hints and makes gentle suggestions. But here they invite experts from all over Europe to talk to the parents about the harm of internet in children under 16 and the dangers of giving them smartphones. It is regularly in newsletters. I mean, I think what we've been in school for. Seven months, maybe, and I think there have been two speakers about the issue already at the school, which we haven't gone to because our limited, you know, our limited understanding of, of, Spanish and then Catalan was like, forget it. But, they're very, very proactive in heavily discouraging the parents on letting their children even have, you know, screen time at home, tablet time at home, and certainly not you know, social media access, certainly not that's the, that's like, you know, you might as well give your children heroin or alcohols and don't,
Track 1:So moving.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:is, this is a terrible
Track 1:kind of like going back in time and it's sort of like being able to raise your son in the 80s in terms of how you are, how he is interacting with. Cell phones and social media and all these things. But I mean,
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:At school. At home it's different, because he's got two parents that are working, and, you know, so he is
Track 1:out on the streets and you cannot get a hold of him. Most parents would have been like my phone. I want to know where you're at at all times. That's very brave of
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:will, well, I will say I do have an Apple AirTag attached to my
Track 1:you, so if he
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:and I have given him my keys.
Track 1:you can find your child.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:So long as he does not lose my keys, I know where that boy is.
Track 1:That's great. Does he know that that's true?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:He does. And actually yesterday, yesterday, when he had his friend come over, I sent him by himself to go pick up his friend, uh, where he was being dropped off at a cafe. Um, and I, but I did say, I did say, take your air tag out of your backpack. Cause we also have, cause now he's taking the public bus to school in the morning, not the private school bus. And so I, um, I said, take your air tag out of your backpack and put it in your coat for me, please. And he's like, mom, it's just, I'm like, I know, but this is new for me. And when I was growing up, there was stuff going on and I'm just, I'm, I'm practicing. Just do this one thing for me. He's like, all right,
Track 1:So
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:but I think I've been thinking, you know, how's that as I was listening to that podcast at two o'clock this morning, that episode of honestly, I was thinking about actually sharing it with my son because he's a pretty astute 10 year old. And I think, you know, Jonathan Haidt begins that interview. Discussing how childhood was when he was born in 19, I think he was born in like 1963 or something versus how it is now. And I kind of want my son to hear that, like, this is how it used to be. This is normal. This is healthy. This is what happened. This is why it happened. So he has an understanding not only of. Someone other than his parents saying what is normal is not healthy or okay, but also Maybe having an understanding why when I'm nagging on him to get off the screen and do something else when his dad is like Set a timer and we're done with that He has a deeper understanding of what we're thinking of when we're asking him to do that
Track 1:I look forward to hearing how that goes.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:we'll see if his attention span can last the whole hour and 15 minutes of that episode, but
Track 1:Hopefully he'll take away at least the high points.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Yes, yes
Track 1:Well, what would you like to leave our listeners and especially our parent listeners with today?
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:if you do feel that how, that the culture that your children are being raised in isn't working for them, it's not working for you and you've not yet escaped or escaping is not an option, because we can't assume all our listeners are planning on leaving, right? Do listen to that episode of honestly with Bari Weiss, pick up some Jonathan Heights books and start talking to other parents. Because when the parents come together, even if this is one of the suggestions he made, talk to the parents of your child's friend group. And if the parents of your child's friend group can come together and agree, let's simultaneously enforce these boundaries, then your child's not the only one who is having those limitations put upon them. Then it becomes more normalized, and we will not have this change happen until we normalize those boundaries and, and the, the parents and the administrators of the schools saying no cell phones, no cell phones. If all of the parents came to the school, wrote to the school, went to PTA meetings and say, just take our kids cell phones. Before they walk into class, it would be done because the schools hate the kids having cell phones. They can't
Track 1:but they're not going to put up any boundaries because they're afraid of parents. And so it does have to come from the parents first, which is what parents want too. And then they
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:And I think it's really, it's, it's emblematic of how I think our entire nation is right now, where we are by and large, way more on the same page than not, but nobody is talking about it and we will not get to the place all of us want to be until we break the silence.
Track 1:We have to stop. We have to say to all of the influencers. And by that, I mean the people in charge and the people in charge of media and say, no, my neighbors are not my enemy. And I refuse to believe it any longer, because as long as they can divide us from each other, they win and we lose.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:Exactly.
Track 1:Well, that was a deep thought to end on. Let's sign off to our listeners today. To them, I shall say au revoir and à la prochaine fois.
squadcaster-c43e_1_03-28-2024_043815:And to them I shall say adios and adieu.
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